Is there something scarier than the first date? Butterflies are ripping the stomach apart. You’re confused and excited, having no idea what to do. But it’s not the date itself but preparations that can make you go crazy. She gave you her number, and you called and asked her out. But as the long-awaited day approaches, you begin wondering if you should confirm the date. There’s nothing wrong about asking. After all, your new companion may have some unexpected business to take care of, and she’s not going to show up. But what if you text to confirm a date, and she thinks you’re desperate? If you want to know how to do everything right, we have a few tips for you.
It’s quite important to call up and confirm the details. Both of you need to be sure you’ll come to the same spot at the appointed time. It’s called "being polite." However, some people are so afraid of first dates that they can’t get up the nerve and confirm a date. As a result, they only make things more awkward. Let’s boost your self-confidence a bit and figure out why it’s OK to confirm dates and how to do this through a phone call and text message.
Why Confirming a Date Is Normal
Some guys believe that confirming a date can somehow undermine their value in a woman’s eyes. "What if she thinks I’m too worried?" "I’m gonna let her think this date isn’t that important to me." So, does it mean that asking a girl if she still wants to see you is a waste of time? Quite the opposite, but for many people, it’s a matter of going outside the comfort zone. Most men pretend they’re too busy to spend a few minutes and confirm plans. Some just think it’s miserable. But in actuality, you’ll feel much more miserable after waiting for three hours in a restaurant and finding out the girl couldn’t come because her puppy went missing. So, unless you know where to meet girls who never change plans, you should stay in touch with your companion. But there are more reasons why it’s fine to confirm a date.
First of all, it’s just a good gesture and a sign of concern. You’ll hardly find a woman who would call it desperate or something. Conversely, any lady would be glad to receive a confirmation message. It shows you’re genuinely interested in seeing her and want to make sure everything goes as planned. In plain English, it tells how serious your intentions are. If a person bothers calling or texting, they’re not going to back down. By today’s standards, confirmations are a flattering addition to dating.
Confirming a date with a girl, you help her get rid of anxiety. Sometimes, the emotions from the first date can be overwhelming, and it’s hard for women to handle them. Stressful anticipation can spoil a date before you even get to enjoy it. Imagine how difficult it is for your companion to mentally prepare for a romantic evening if even you are so anxious about confirming it. She’s not sure if it’s a good idea and doesn’t know how to deal with her feelings. She probably struggles to pick the right outfit for a date, come up with the right topics for a conversation, and present herself. A confirmation call will set her mind straight – she’ll know for sure that the date will happen.
When you ask a girl out, you kind of say she’s attractive. At least that’s what men think. But women need more proof. While you’re getting ready for a date, she may be playing your last conversation inside her head over and over again, wondering if she’s really that good. And the fact that you haven’t contacted her since you asked her out begins to cause some doubts. She starts thinking you’ve already changed your mind, and the date won’t happen. One text message is all it takes to boost her self-confidence and make her believe you like her.
Won't I Look Unconfident If I Confirm a Date?
While browsing the web for articles on how to confirm a date, you might stumble upon dozens of forums and blogs where "dating experts" and "pros" claim that calling or texting a girl to confirm plans is a sign of weakness, a lack of self-confidence. Thanks to these "expert tips," hundreds of ordinary guys are afraid of approaching girls. As a result, instead of boosting their efficiency on the dating scene and feeling confident, chatting with single females online, they struggle to ask girls out because they don’t know what to do after that.
Sure, some ladies do think that real men don’t need confirmation calls. But usually, this is a type of woman you’d prefer to never deal with. The thing is that such girls are mostly into one-night stands. They’re particularly looking for brutal, manly guys to have some fun for a night and never meet again. But if your goal is to find a person to date and maybe even build a relationship with, manly behavior isn’t your best ally. A tough guy approach rarely works for serious relationships, while a caring attitude and confirmation calls are a sign of stability, which is beneficial in the long run.
It’s no secret that a healthy union of hearts thrives on respect. Why add uncertainty and turn a date night into a guessing game where your companion wonders if you show up? Life is pretty busy nowadays, and it’s hard to carve out some time for dating. Hence, the question of confirming a date isn’t about weakness or self-confidence – it’s about respect for your partner’s time and effort. So in case you’re still asking yourself, "Should I text to confirm a date?" you’re certainly should. There are so many circumstances that may ruin a girl’s plans. A confirmation call is peace of mind.
Texting to Confirm a Date: Message Ideas
Confirming dates is pretty smart because you can’t be 100% sure about your new companion, and you haven’t reached a high level of connection, meaning that nothing stops her from canceling her plans for you. A short call or a text message will calm you down, and you’ll be sure the girl is still up for a romantic evening. The big question is, "How do you confirm a date via text?" Of course, you can always go with something simple, like “Are we still on?” but it’s so plain and tasteless. Think of this message as an opportunity to not only get confirmation from a girl but also show off your charm. Check out these ideas and feel free to use them to make up your own ones.
“Looking forward to a great evening.”
Nothing extra. It’s quite an effective and, at the same time, straightforward message. Statements generally sound much more confident than questions. By texting, “Are you still up for a date at 8?” you’re leaving a door open for her. But with messages like this one, you just remind her that you both agreed to a date, and more importantly, you’re feeling enthusiastic about it. And you’ll pass this enthusiasm on.
“Wussup, just making sure you’re getting ready for a date.”
This one works best when you’re confirming a date the night before because it shows how fast your companion responds. If it’s been more than 12 hours, and you get no response, the date’s canceled. If she texts you back right before the appointed time, but you both agreed to confirm your plans a day prior, you can safely say you’re busy. She probably flakes on you, so things won’t work out anyway.
“When can I pick you up tomorrow?”
Girls worship self-confident men who know how to treat ladies. So instead of asking if she’s down for a date, leave her no choice and ask when to pick her up. Besides, she’ll be glad to know you want to escort her. Want to be more confident? Just text, “I’ll pick you up at 8 pm tomorrow. Be ready.” This will make you sound like an alpha. You show that cancellation isn’t an option. All she needs to do is to accept that the date happens. A confident approach and the fact that you’re giving her a ride will work like a charm.
“I’m pretty serious about this date, so don’t be late))”
Don’t be afraid to be a little manipulative and play with her feeling of responsibility. A message like this will make her think you’ve been working hard for this date, so she’ll most likely come, even if she was going to bail at first.
“Best timing for a date – I’d gladly have some martini after our meeting.”
It’s always great to infuse a bit of humor into the message. It will lighten up the atmosphere while confirming your plans. Plus, you’ll remind your companion that she’s up for some relaxation after a hard day at work. And that’s all you need to know about how to confirm a date with a girl via text. But there’s always room for improvement. Keep it calm, and you won’t appear desperate. And avoid unnecessary questions. Details don’t matter – the main thing is to get confirmation from her.
How to Confirm a Date Without Sounding Desperate
No matter how confident you were when asking her out, you can still mess things up when you call her before the date. So, you better know what you’re going to say and how you’re going to say it. Follow the tips below to confirm a date like a pro.
Don’t show that you need it more than her
The main trick is not to think too much of the upcoming date. Of course, the first meeting is all about first impressions, and it will probably be decisive, but the more you think about it, the more complicated it will seem. Treating a date like a simple meeting, you won’t make an impression of a needy guy when calling her. And the chances of this happening are quite high, especially if the girl is pretty. First of all, avoid asking if she’s still okay to meet up. You make yourself sound like the girl is doing you a favor. You need to sound confident when confirming a date, and with this approach, you won’t. Instead, try to be short – keep the chatter for a date.
Patience is virtue
Some pickup pros will tell you otherwise, though. If you call to discover that your companion can’t come to a date, there’s no need to cut all ties yet. Life can be unpredictable, and you never know what will happen tomorrow. It’s ok if she cancels a date once or twice. Third time’s the charm, but if she backs down three times, call the quits. Most articles will tell you to dump the girl right when she refuses once, but don’t forget that we’re all humans. We all have to reschedule plans from time to time, so don’t get mad at your companion if she does the same to you.
Too much texting is bad
Most likely you want to make a confirmation message as romantic, funny, or witty as possible, but try not to do that. Again, your life doesn’t depend on the girl saying, “Sure, I’m still down.” After all, there are plenty of other options around. Also, you can’t tell how your companion will react to your sense of humor or charm skills, so keep the confirmation message simple. A few words should be more than enough to show that you’re waiting for the date.
Watch what you say
Depending on the words you choose, you might come across either as desperate or wondering. Naturally, the latter is what we’re aiming at. If you struggle to choose between a call or a text, it’s better to stick to a text. A call is a bit more personal, and there’s a chance she’ll agree to a date just because she didn’t have enough courage to cancel it. But if she has, it’ll be much more embarrassing to hear the girl say no to you. That’s why text messages work better. The thing here is not to overdo it with text and pick the best words. If the message is too long, she might think you’re putting too much effort; if it’s too short, the girl might think you don’t bother at all. And no one needs fancy words. Keep it friendly and light and try not to use phrases, like, “If you have other plans, it’s fine.” This sounds as desperate as, “God, please, don’t ignore me!”
Never call twice
If you’ve already confirmed a date with a girl, there’s no need to do this again. You called or texted, and she said that she’d be there. Nothing more. You should either change the topic or end the conversation once you get the answer. If you haven’t got any response at all, then you’ll probably won’t, and it’s time to dump her and start looking for someone else to date. If your companion really cares about the date, she won’t need any reminders. But even if you confirmed the date, there’s still a chance to spend the evening alone.
But if you do, do it right
Let’s say you’ve agreed to have a date this week. You already called to confirm it a couple of days ago, but the girl hasn’t come in contact since. What’s the best way out in this case? Never forget that your companion may be a bit shy, and she can’t pluck up her courage and reach out to you. If that’s the case, you can text something neutral that would indicate your interest but won’t concern the date. Something like, "I’ve just watched that movie you told me before. It’s not bad at all!" If she reacts and starts texting you back, she’s probably still interested. But if you get no reply, we have bad news for you.
Humor won’t work
Humor makes everything better, but not always. Even if you’re the best joker in town, it would be better if you avoid joking when confirming a date. At moments like this, the best approach is to be serious and show that this meeting means something to you. Sure, once she confirms her plans, you can make as many jokes as you like as long as they’re good and don’t concern the date.
Mind your language
No, this won’t show you as a brutal macho man but rather a person to never talk to again. Well, you’re free to curse if your companion does so, but if that’s the case, wouldn’t it be better to think twice about your choice? Usually, people who have just met each other try to avoid obscene language, especially if they’re counting on something. And keep your spelling in mind. When chatting with your buddies, it’s fine if you make mistakes from time to time. But when you’re texting with your potential partner, it’s better to proofread your messages. Clean English is a nice bonus when it comes to dating. For many ladies, poor grammar is one of the major turn-offs. It’s a sign of laziness and lack of intelligence.
A Few Things to Keep in Mind
If you don’t want to sound desperate when confirming a date, always stick to the "two strikes" rule. This means that you can contact your companion only two times. If she replies, awesome; if she doesn’t, forget about her, delete her number, and never think of her again.
As for when to confirm a date, it’s best to do this an evening before or the morning of the appointed day. If you text too early, you’ll sound too eager, which might scare her off. You also give her more time to change her mind, even if she has already agreed. Conversely, if you do this too late, your companion may have other plans. That’s why the perfect time is between the evening and the morning. If you agreed to meet during the daytime, then confirm the date the previous evening. And stick to messages instead of calls. They’re much more convenient.