Psychologists cannot come to a joint decision when talking about how a person's character is formed — at the genetic level or a consequence of experience from early childhood. Most likely, the answer is a symbiosis of these two versions. As a rule, a personality is already formed at the age of understanding, and it does not change significantly in the future.
Nevertheless, some studies show that significant events in life can change a person's character, for example, convinced introverts, who are often required to speak to people because of the work of their dreams, turn into extroverts. A significant event, after which many people become different, is the conclusion of a marriage. This is not strange that relationships change after they become legitimate and that men seek ways to be a better husband.
Everything Changes When You Are a Husband
Do not be afraid. Your relationship will not get worse after you acquire the "husband" status, instead, on the contrary. Official registration will eliminate the remnants of fear, boredom in relationships, and insecurities allowing you to fully open to each other. Now your relationship will become more open, liberated, and sincere. Or maybe you will feel genuinely protected in a marriage. What could be better?
Marriage is an essential event for some trivial reasons too. The way you call each other "husband and wife" brings about new feelings. After official registration, you will discover a new level of responsibility. At first, all this will be a little surprising, but, therefore, even more pleasant! On the one hand, when you swore oaths, you have proved that you want to live your life only with each other. And now you can easily let your partner go to meet friends, and trust them because it was your choice to tie a knot.
On the other hand, the concept of "mine" fades gradually, and more and more things become "ours." And you should not forget about this either. After all, now you are a family!
What is most important, your priorities change after marriage. Men are no longer interested in single women dating. They want to devote time to their family and raising children. You begin to notice that the interests of the spouse become more important than your own. You support each other when one of you needs help, and will sacrifice everything for the sake of another one. Why? Because family life involves many compromises because you can make each other happy only in this way! And now, this is your common concern.
The last thing that changes is your communication. Previously, your messages were filled with hidden meaning. One of you said something. Another tried to understand the hint. But now everything has become much more comfortable. Sometimes one question or a word is enough to understand each other. Now there is no need to search for hidden meaning. You have already made your choice and wonder only about how to be a better husband and father.
Vital Features to Develop to Be a Better Husband
A man is endowed with a more significant measure of the necessary qualities and strength to exercise supremacy in marriage. Many women do not like the idea of leadership because many husbands are far from ideal. But how to be a better husband to your wife so that she respects you? This article will be appealing not only for men but for women. Below, we will consider what a husband needs to do to become an ideal spouse and head of the family for his wife.
Focus on what the spouse is saying
Fight your inability to sit still when your life partner is talking to you. In the eyes of women, your ignorance really looks rude, even offensive. It is difficult for wives to come to terms with the fact that a man absent-mindedly stares in his phone, showing he is uninterested in what the woman says. It is clear why women can not stand it sometimes and break into a cry. Therefore, when the hubby learns to focus on the conversation and is interested, everyone will win. You will kill two birds with one stone: your wife will be happy, and you will avoid many troubles because, after all, she says a lot of beneficial and essential things.
Watch the tone of your speech
Men should remember that women listen to not only the words spoken but also how they are spoken. Husbands sometimes forget and talk with their wives the way they do with colleagues or their friends. They forget about the situation they are now and can complain to a woman about her own actions talking about her in the third person like she is not present there with him. Maybe if you paid more attention to your beloved and watched your mouth, you wouldn't have to complain about her irritation all the time? She pays you back with the same treatment. Try to speak softer, and the result will surprise you over time.
Try to be patient
Of course, women are not happy to be late, forget about their promises, or not being able to implement what they planned into life. So, do not remind your beloved about her failures and be patient when she needs time to cope with something. Love and the desire to forgive should be your companions on the way to becoming a better husband. In case any of your wife's habits still make you crazy, remember that the reason is in the habit, not the woman herself. You still love her, but you would like her to change for the sake of your relationship and be more responsible. This will help be patient.
Give her gifts
Every woman loves to receive gifts. But most husbands usually consider small spontaneous surprises a waste of time, money, and effort. In the worst case, they present gifts to their beloved but only on the critical dates, the celebration, and occasions when this is predictable. Of course, women are happy with such gifts, but at heart, they perceive them as a cheap attempt to follow the traditions and pretend to be a better husband. Expected gifts automatically devalue the spirit or principle of giving because the attention should be constant and spontaneous. Do you want your woman to consider you a perfect husband? Then take it as a rule to give your wife flowers, gifts, or make beautiful compliments about her beauty not only for the holidays but just to make her happy.
Do not get mad at her mood swings
After all, women experience hormonal changes from time to time, not you. Try to consider that after the birth of a child, several children, due to stress, or with age, the majority of women change their need for sex due to hormonal changes and experience mood swings in general. Now their thoughts are more concerned with other issues than with intimate marital relationships. Unlike a man, a woman cannot automatically instantly tune in to sex, especially having sex every day and several times. There is no arguing against female nature and hormonal changes. If you want to learn how to be a better husband, respect the choices and feelings of your wife, and support her in times when she doesn't know what is going on.
Keep a romantic relationship
Women love romance. Each of them always expects at least some spontaneous cute gestures from their marriage partner. Wives do not like it when husbands are like old "crackers," always referring to everything only from a practical side. It is not hard just sometimes to think about how to do something romantic for your wife. Even a small detail will make you appear a real romantic in her eyes. It is essential to always keep the romance alive in a marital relationship. After several years of relationship, love loses its spark. But you can revive it again, rekindle interest in healthy relationships, and continuously be a better husband.
Learn to be an attentive spouse, complimenting your life partner
You can read books on being a better husband like "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" or "Five languages of love." They teach people to better understand the psychology of the opposite sex and find the best approach to your lover. The husband should be attentive to his wife's feelings, mood, and appearance, and let her know when they notice changes in her appearance (or even if you do not notice anything). Avoid things that annoy your life partner, wanting to anger her. Tell her how good she looks. If a woman feels that you lose interest in her, she will be less passionate and sexual. Do you want to discover the secret of how to become a better husband in the eyes of your wife? Admire your sweetheart in public. It will emphasize your love, attention to your spouse. Also, do not forget the select dates even when living together, for example, a wedding day, the date of acquaintance. Try to notice your wife's new hairstyle or dress.
Show your wife that she is the most valuable and desired person for you
Every woman wants to be sure that she is more valuable for a marriage partner than friends, relatives, work. She wants to feel, see, know that she is the most coveted woman in her man's life. She wants to play a significant role in his life, and not just be a cook, housekeeper, educator, especially after the first years of marriage. Always notice what your little wife is trying to do for you, and do not take it for granted. Good husbands are usually not the most handsome men, but they must be so good that their wives consider them the best.
Never “educate” your wife in public
Misunderstandings, women's failures are best to discuss at home in private. If you do this in front of others, you publicly shame your woman and show disrespect for her reputation and feelings. We all make mistakes, but our other half should be a person who will always support us and reassure that everything will be ok. You should not fear your partner, think that they will make fun of you, or teach you a lesson. So, why should you do this to your woman? Let her be vulnerable, make mistakes, and calmly discuss them at home. Shaming her, you surpass her position, put her lower, and it is not fair.
To become a good husband, avoid sharing responsibilities
Wanting to make a marriage partner happy, refrain from strong principles in the distribution of household duties. You should not make excuses, considering that men are not supposed to help their wives since washing, cleaning, ironing, and washing dishes is a purely female duty. For a successful marriage, you should help your woman in the household chores. We live in the twenty-first century and the times when some spheres of work were gender-connected have long gone away.
Small Everyday Things to Do to Help You Be a Better Husband
You will benefit from her happiness — you will be free next to a joyful wife, and she will help you become better and will take care of you with incredible zeal. Read these recommendations and think if you have done everything possible to strengthen your alliance and universal happiness in your marriage. Being a better husband is not difficult; here are a few everyday things you can try to achieve this.
Speak
Women love to listen to men. Your wife wants to hear you just like the girl with whom you flirted in a cafe today. Tell your wife compliments always.
This freeway is the most potent antidote to tantrums. Remind her that you love her at least every three days if you love, of course. Although in addition to confessions, you can find many other beautiful words that will warm the female heart and give her a sense of security. She is with you for the sake of this feeling.
Give presents
Women are always happy for surprises. Teach yourself to make small gifts to your wife for no reason — you can't imagine what great happiness this is for her! Although it's easy to imagine, give her some beautiful little things and watch her eyes light up. To make an unexpected gift is the same as declaring love. This is the attention that every person needs.
Hug
Hugging is so lovely! Probably, you have already forgotten how it is — just to come up and hug her. This is a manifestation of tenderness that acts on a woman better than any expensive face cream. If you regularly stroke and hug your beloved woman, she will become more beautiful every day. So, one of the answers to the question, "How can I be a better husband?" is a tangible expression of attention.
Stay calm
Everyone has emotions, but in men, they follow their thoughts. The female psyche is very complicated. It is associated with constant hormonal changes in the body. Accept this fact. The next time you see that your wife is about to burst with emotion, stay calm, create a counterweight. And you will get one quarrel less!
Ask
A woman needs to share her experiences with you. Listen to her without feeling boredom and sorrow. Here's the secret: for both partners to be satisfied with the conversation, you should ask what you are genuinely interested in, do not do this automatically. Some women are greedy for unrelated conversation topics. Skip these lumps of text, but do not forget to ask from time to time, "How did you feel at the same time? What were your emotions?" With this secret, you will be a welcome conversationalist for any woman, by the way.
Allow
Let the wife meet her friends and go somewhere without you periodically. This is so great — and you will have enough time for your personal affairs. Be sure to sponsor her gatherings with friends. Of course, it is better that they also are married. But even if they are just her childhood friends, if nothing happened between them before, it is unlikely that the spark will ignite.
Keep quiet
One topic that you should never raise with your beloved woman is your ex and the past relationship experiences in general. Talk to someone else if you can't hold it inside. Another thing that you should stop yourself from saying is any unconstructive criticism. Never tell her that she has put on weight, has a bad taste, or acted stupidly. Women know the language of hints. If you are unsure about how to tell her about something, try to hint on this indirectly or just help her get better with your own example.
Plan
Spend 2 hours a week with your wife, doing exciting things — you can take a walk, go to a restaurant, work out together, watch a movie, or paint. But it should be only your time. Even if you don't have such a need, do it. Over time, you get drawn, you will like it. Intimacy is a common cause for every joint leisure, but it can be not only physical. The emotional closeness matters way more in close relationships.
Take care of your development
It is necessary for both your wife and you. We have come to this world to become better. Read, train your hobby, work out, learn new things — the wife will be proud of you. With a developing husband, she will want to correspond, so this will encourage the woman to also work on herself.
Remember
Always remember what she means for you and why you made such a choice. You must have a goal that is not related to the family, aimed at the outside world. Family is your support. With a reliable woman next to you, it will be easier to go where you always dreamed of getting. If you regard marriage as helping you achieve a selfish goal, you will do everything to save the family. Learn to motivate yourself like a man!
One of the reasons why it is difficult to become a good husband is the female ideas of the perfect partner. The male ideas about this change dramatically throughout family life. At first, a woman needs a passionate lover with a beautiful appearance, but after years of living together, her stereotypes change. Now she considers a good husband to be an attentive, sensitive, gentle, and wise man.
The qualities that really help a man become a perfect husband for his wife will vary for every woman. But it should be remembered that there are qualities and preferences that all women want to see in their men. When the spouse shows them, he will become the best and most desired for his wife.